Expertise

Resentments build up, feelings get hurt and communication goes off track. Sadly, time doesn't heal bad patterns.

Perhaps you want to change your partner, yourself or the whole trajectory of your love life? If you need some counseling to get close again contact me.

I'll help you define and break those sticky, painful patterns. I'll help you get some new skills together.

Patterns abound

The brain is a pattern matching machine. Without patterns we would have uncertainty and chaos. The problem happens certain patterns take on a life of their own becoming both unhealthy and unrelenting. They act out through you and don't listen when you tell them to stop.

What kind of patterns? Let's see... there are so many possibilities. Take bickering. This is an old school one that our relatives perfected. It's ugly and abrasive, but widely shown in sitcoms. Bickering is a romance killer.

Here is another pattern...interrupting your partner. It's rude and disrespectful. But widely used.

Frequently bringing up past transgressions. Tuning out. Arguing about chores. Grabbing your phone too often. Showing distain. Being critical. Stonewalling as a means of control. Excessive complaining.

Too many to name, but each one is ding on the shine of you connection. It drives you to misinterpretation and taking each for granted.

This frustrating walk through quicksand is hard to stop because patterns are hard wired in and supported by the brains capacity for habituation. It takes real conscious effort and unconscious observation to break entrenched patterns.

Bad patterns be gone

I understand how hard it is when things are off track.  Your serenity is screaming for relief. I'll help you create a path to feel newer and avoid the same kind of pitfalls in the future.  

      ..........Warm regards, Laressa Desmond, PhD.

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